The most courageous father ever to walk the earth.....

I've seen many great examples of fathers in my life.  I love my own father dearly and appreciate the ethical standard he has set for me.  Sure, there were plenty of times that I had disagreements with him, but for the most part, we get along wonderfully and I would sure be a worse person if he hadn't been there to shape my life.  My grandfathers were very different men, but both were strong father figures, each in there own special way.  My paternal grandfather was a quiet, reserved man, filled with faith and a belief in a hard work ethic, as he was a farmer and a truck driver.  My maternal grandfather also showed a strong work ethic, but was a bit more outspoken than my paternal grandfather.  Quick with a joke, he found humor in life to be a way to spread God's joy.  Between them, they had 14 kids, 9 on my father's side and 5 on my mother's.  Neither provided wealth for their families by society's standards, but both provided a strong foundation.

I also see great examples of fathers in my friends, my family, and my faith community.  I knew a man from church who raised his 13 kids alone after his wife passed away.  He definitely had his hands full, but I respect that he had a pew full of kids at church every Sunday, and they were well involved in church activities.  I know a father who has, with his wife, adopted and fostered several children, especially kids from very difficult circumstances.  Another man I know has an adult son with Down's Syndrome.  I always see them together at church serving as ushers.  They serve at the Knights of Columbus pancake breakfasts together.  He still finds time to volunteer at church and our school, and when he sees my kids he makes a special effort to say hello. 

With all of these great examples of fatherhood, I still look to St. Joseph as the ultimate example of courageous fatherhood.  Not much is said about Joseph in the bible, but what is said is illuminating to how much fortitude it took to be a foster father to the Son of God. 

Joseph was a carpenter in a small town.  He was betrothed to a young woman who had vowed virginity.  One day, Mary lets it be known the revelation told to her by the angel Gabriel.  At this moment, Joseph made the decision to divorce Mary quietly, in an effort to avoid what would quite possibly be the stoning of Mary as an adultress.  Joseph probably had doubts in his mind at this time about Mary's fidelity, but he still had the integrity and the love for Mary to find a way that would save her life.  If the story of Joseph had ended here, that would say a lot about the kind of man Joseph was.  It was God's will, though, that his Son be born of the line of David, of which Joseph came.  This was to fulfill scripture that the familial line of David would rule the Kingdom of God always, as Jesus would be the King of Kings.  God needed Joseph to be the earthly father to a boy who would be both God and Man.  The angel appeared to Joseph.  His announcement was not "Obey me Joseph," or "Here is the command of the Lord, Joseph."  Rather, his opening was, "Fear not, Joseph."  Joseph was being called to be courageous.

The hardships endured during the journey to Bethlehem, the joy of the birth of the Christ, and the subsequent flight to Egypt took a special man to handle.  Imagine traveling dangerous route to Bethlehem, finding no place fit for Mary to give birth, setting up a meager manger as a bed, and then being warned to flee to avoid Harod's wrath back to Egypt, the land where Joseph's and Mary's ancestors had once been slaves.  Imagine the wonder in Joseph's mind if he would be able to teach Jesus anything, knowing his Father was the Creator, and that Jesus shared in that divinity. 

I look at St. Joseph as a great example of how to father my children.  While I know my children are not divine, I still am in awe that God has trusted me with their care.  I know how I have failed my God many times throughout my life, and yet He has more faith in me than I have in Him.  I know that my kids have a lot to learn, so don't wonder if I will be able to teach them things - I know they are sponges looking for me to teach them.  I just wonder if I will be able to teach them the right way.  I know I cannot do it alone, so I put my trust in God.  I praise the Father for all of creation, I tearfully rejoice that the Son has redeemed us from the wickedness of sin, and I invite the Holy Spirit to guide me and strengthen me.  Amen.

"God, watch over me.  The sea is so big, and my boat is so small."
                                 -prayer of an unknown fisherman


The photo you see to the left is a great photograph.  It shows my family walking on a path together.  I am on the left with Faith on my shoulders.  Justin is at my side, and Libby holding onto him.  On the other side of the bridge is my wife Betty Ann.  This photo is an incomplete portrayal of our family.  It was taken before the birth of our newest addition, a bright-eyed boy named Patrick.  Also not pictured was our daughter Catherine, who died at birth.  While we did not get to see her grow, her presence in our lives was a blessing in disguise which has made a huge difference in our development as Christians.

This photograph certainly can be seen as a symbol of the journey that we are traveling together.  The journey of life can lead us to choose our damnation, or it could lead us to eternal salvation.  The choices we make as parents affect the way our children make their choices.  The little ones also impact the way my wife and I make choices about our lives. 

Think of it like a journey on a ship.  We may occaisionally steer the ship off course, choosing sin instead of the will of God.  Thankfully, through the perfect sacrifice of Jesus on Calvary, and the divine mercy which we cannot understand, we have plenty of opportunities to correct our course.  Each of these course corrections are moments of conversion - that is, the turning away from sin and the return to the course set for us by God.  Sometimes those corrections are slight - a 5 or 10 degree turn from course.  Sometimes it requires a full 180 degree turn to get back on track.

Thanks be to God who led me to know the lovely person who eventually became my wife.  All praise and thanksgiving to Him who blessed us with wonderful children, each a blessing in their own individual way.  Each of us is an important member of our crew on the journey of life.  One day, my son may be the compass that tells us we are not heading due north.  Another day, it might be my daughter noticing that the path in the stars is not right.  My wife will often be my rudder, keeping me out of troubled waters.  Sometimes, it is my job to be the captain, the man who has to stand up for my crew and protect them from danger, whether it be from inside our outside our vessel.

"In the beginning...."

I've often wondered what motivates people to put together a blog.  Most of them seem to identify a person's interest in hobbies, in special interests, or in things that touch them personally.  I'm not very fond of many blogs, because they often are detailed descriptions of someone's personal life.  I'm sorry, but I'm not really interested in how the Betty Crocker version of a particular recipe wasn't as good as the one found on the Food Network's web site.  I think the number one thing that I dislike about blogs is that they are mostly litanies of complaining.  There aren't too many people who enjoy being around negative people for too long, so celebrations of the things we don't like really cannot have mass appeal.

For these reasons, I never thought I'd find use for a blog.  It didn't seem to be my thing.  However, recent introspection into my life and my relationships have given me an idea.  Not a new idea, mind you, but one that has motivated me to search out the inner blogger in me.  In my soul-searching, one thing that kept haunting me is that I am not truly living up to my calling as an evangelist - that is, I wasn't living up to my baptismal calling as priest, prophet, and king.  If I cannot serve my fellow man as a priest in the service of God (not an ordained priesthood, mind you, but one of normal service toward man), and I fail to proclaim His Good News as a prophet, I will never share in the Kingdom of God.  To that end, I will compose reflections on a topic that is dear to my heart - Christian fatherhood.  I thought of also doing a separate blog on reflections of being a Christian husband, but for me, the two are inseparable.  Later reflections will delve into this deeper.

In reflecting on my life, the three top characteristics that I identify in myself is that I am a Christian first, a husband second, and a father third.  Other family and friends fall behind these priorities in life, as does work, and certainly the materialism of society.  God has called upon me to follow Jesus and carry my cross, and on that journey I am called to be a companion to my lovely wife, and according to His will, we are called to bring forth and raise four five lovely children plus one child who has already touched the face of God.  Everything else in life falls behind these priorities.

I am not writing this blog because I feel that I am the perfect father and that I have great wisdom to bestow upon fathers everywhere.  On the contrary, I know that I am very flawed.  We all are.  My motivation for doing this blog is to reflect on specific thoughts that I have about what it means to be a Christian father, and what that means in respect to our modern society.  I'm not a preacher or a sociologist, I'm just a father who thinks that fatherhood means something way more than how it is seen in society. 

I am heavily motivated by the movie Courageous, and one line in that movie specifically has had an impact in my journey of life.  The lead character was introducing his revelation of fatherhood to his friends and how he needed to improve.  One of his friends said, "You're a good enough dad."  In my mind, I stated the response before the actor on the screen did...."I don't want to be a good enough dad, I want to be the dad I was called by God to be."  I'm not quoting the movie verbatim here, but this is the basic idea that echoed in my mind throughout the rest of the movie, and honestly ever since. 

Hopefully, this gives a little insight into my reason for doing this blog.  I don't know if it will ever be read by anybody, but I think it will certainly help me develop myself into the dad that God wants me to be.  If there is someone who reads this, please feel free to respond.  If you feel an ache in your heart to be more, and you need someone to discuss things with, I would be more than happy to walk your journey with you, so long as you are willing to walk my journey with me.

God Bless, and enjoy future posts.